So I was watching "Entertainment Tonight" because some homegirl ordered me to, and I saw a snippet of something about former Golden Girl Estelle Getty. So naturally I googled Bea Arthur and ended up at her IMDB page. I clicked on the link for "Maude" and saw that Conrad Bain was on that show. You know, the dude who played the adoptive father on "Diff'rent Strokes." Yeah, Mr. Drummond. So I thought, hey, I'll bet you anything that Conrad Bain is gay. (Yes, I often make bets with myself.) So I googled him and found out that Conrad has a twin brother named . . .
Yes, Bonar Bain. It's true. And of course my brain kept running, and I then thought, holy shit--I'll venture a wager that Conrad was slipping his boy Gary Coleman the bonar, and that's why the kid is so fuct to this day. Goddamnit, ALL those kids from that show ended up fuct!!! CONRAD TURNED KIMBERLY AND WILLIS OUT.